Shout It Out

This week has been an emotional week. 

My friend lost her grandfather suddenly.  A man she looked up to.  A man she loved dearly.

A friend lost her husband unexpectedly.  A man that she was married to for almost 39 years.  They had 3 children, 2 grandchildren, and tons of other family.  He was a friend to all.  He loved those he knew with passion and loyalty.  He welcomed everyone into his home for help, whether you were family or not.  And he will be desperately missed by all.

Another friend's son fell into a river and we have no answers yet.  They simply have him listed as "missing".  He was only 24 years old.  Just at the beginning of a promising career doing something that he loved.  And now she lays awake every night wondering if he's already gone.  If he laying somewhere broken and afraid.  I can't even begin to comprehend the terror she is experiencing right now.

Listening to the eulogy at my friend's husband's funeral, I heard so many happy stories.  Memories that he had made with everyone.  Explanations for all those mysterious happenings in his childhood (like the floor patched because of a gun accident no one knew of, or the gravel truck being taken to the drive in because they charged by the "truck load").  He was a man loved by many. 

All of these men were.

But have you told all of those you love that you love them lately?  Have you held them tight?  Have you taken the time to make memories?  And most importantly, have you said all of those things that you want to?  You don't want to wait for their eulogy.  Tell them now.  Phone them.  Facebook them.  Meet them for coffee.  And let them know now how much they mean to you. 

There is no embarrassment in showing love or respect to those around you.  And you may not even know the most important memory they have of you.  They may remember something else.  It may be a huge turning point in your life that they didn't even know they played a role in.  And it may just need to be what they need to hear right now.

These last few years have been filled with a lot of people that I've had to say goodbye to.  And for the most part, the one regret that I haven't had to live with it "I wish I'd just said..." 

Shout it out if you have to.  But say it.

If you have suffered a loss recently, or are trying to mend relationships, please leave a comment below.  I would love to lift you up in prayer.

In God We Trust

My amazing, kind hearted, beautiful little dude is heartbroken. And I am too. He's almost 4 years old now, and he has lost his Grandma. We lost her to cancer just over 4 months ago. And he is still trying to process all of this.

He actually asked his other Grandpa today if he already knew that God took his Grandma to heaven. Bless his poor little heart. He feels so much!  And so deeply!  And it is so amazingly difficult to walk this path with him. Especially when I have the same questions as he does.  I don't know why her journey ended when it did. I don't know how God decides who to take or not to take.

He finally really cried for her last night. And told me he is angry with God that he took her. And that he thinks it's not fair that God can just take people. I'm assuming he's also a little scared that he might lose someone else, and that he has no control over that. And I get that. I'm angry. I don't think it's fair that she had to suffer. And I don't know who I will lose next, or when. So while I can certainly sympathize with him, I cannot provide any answers.

I can assure him that I will love him every single day of my life.  I can pray with him.  I can share memories of Grandma with him and remind him how deeply she loved him.

But the best thing I can do?  I can pray FOR him.  I can trust that God will fill in all the gaps in his understanding. I can trust that He will give us both peace when we so desperately need it.

I can share how I know that even though this hurts, we will see her again. And all the other people we have lost in this last little while.

I can share how I know that somehow, some way, we will learn how this is part of a bigger picture.  A beautiful picture. And that this plan is so much better than we could ever even imagine.

And I can remember in those tough, angry, sad and agonizing moments that he is hurting because he loves so much. And feels so much. So I need to ask more questions, kiss. Ore cheeks and hug must a little bit longer. And who doesn't love long hugs?